Many people might be wondering why I didnt go for f&n today to print out my stuff. Heee. I was away for Evangelism Training Camp. For those who are not sure what is it, it's actually a camp for christians to learn about the tools and principles of being a child of God & I think at the same time of learning more about Jesus. To tell you seriously, i didnt think much about God before because I lost my faith in Him when i was a beginner & joining KPC didnt really strike to me that i would actually get closer with God. At first, i went to church because my mother and uncle wanted me to go. For now, it's different. It's not my mother and uncle, but it's myself. I want to go. (: Amazing? Haha. Praise God for it!
So I started off at my camp at KPC Ministry on the 11th of June. I went for the night lesson. At first, I felt really sleepy but I held on, with my perserverance, I managed to pull through catching words from Reinhart's film and noting them down. I was new to many things and was totally ignorant to things like prayers, faith and believing. But soon, God worked out his will for me to move. We got into group discussions and started discussing about the questons given and our own thoughts. From there, i knew people like, Angeline, Lydia and Aunt Lay Na(im not sure how her name is spelt. So sorry! =X). So I wasnt that cooperative in terms of speaking about my thoughts and explaining what I learnt from Lesson 2. My first ever lesson with God. My gosh, it was making me all pumped up for more about Him after it. I also cant believe that I actually sat at the couch with my group members for like so long(i barely remember the time) and without feeling bored or sleepy. Maybe at some times feeling sleepy because of not having enough beauty sleep. Haha. Yeap. The floor at the conference room was super hard. I also cant believe that I could fell asleep although i woke up many a times. Power of God~ (:
Day 2, woke up 7.30am for breakfast. Shockingly, I had alot of food during breakfast which I dont usually do because Im not someone who eats breakfast in the morning. How it happened? I dont know. It might be God because he wants me to have the energy for his words later on. I believe in trusting the sentence before this la.. Lol. Anyway, we had Lesson 3. Another great Lesson learnt. Whatever is impossible becomes possible if we have faith and trust in the Lord.
My faith soon grew more. I started to believe more. I even do QT which I dont even know how and why should I spent the time for, but now, I know. (: It went on for a while too and after that it was free time till 12pm for lunch. Then we played pool, Dai di and bridge. Studying time was super cool. Again, it was amazing sitting in the room for hours studying. MAGNIFICO~ =D Then Lesson 4, another deeper faith in him.
"We are to live by faith and not by sight"
We do not need to see then we believe. It's like when things happen then we have faith, but when nothing happens, there would not be any faith. So we have to live by faith, to believe that our Father in Heaven would have everything prepared for us. We depend on him totally cos' we know he will do everything for us. (=
Okay, I guess I shall stop talking about the whole procedure. It's better talking about my feelings and thoughts about this whole camp and what I've learnt. At camp, I dont feel any stress or feel anything bothering me. It's so peaceful within me, because i believe. I had the faith in Him. I truly do. I seem to feel so carefree, it was like the real me. From Sec3 onwards, I felt that I cannot be the real me, because I cant find real happiness. I have problems arising, coming all up to me at one blow. But at camp, it totally showed a reverse about it. I might seem happy on the outside, not caring about anything, but nobody knows how sad, how hurt I am. No one but only God. But he made me go through them all, so that now, I am ready for his words. Im so delighted, elated and smiley. I feel so comfortable, so relaxed like Im all for Him and Him for me. I LOVE GOD!! =D Hehehe.
What I've Learnt
I've learnt that I must have faith, even as small as a mustard seed, it is still a hope there. (: I must believe, I must endure, I must medidate on God's words. I must believe that God is with me forever, or wherever I am. I need to change my temper, my attitude and how i look over things. I dont want to be like before. I want to live what God's will wants me to live like. (: I want to show love for people. I want to give love to people. :D Thank you, Father.
Today, when im back home, the attitude of talking to my parents so nicely, gives me the warmth feeling of ho we were like before. It's so heartwarming and sweet. (: The hatred feelings, the opposing pride in me now all seem to disappear. The communication with my dad seems better and more fluent. I love it! Im becoming more like the real me, the one who smiles and laughs at almost anything. =D I know you all love my smile la. HAHA. Oh ya, at camp, we were practising Chinese speaking for our Chinese O level Oral Examination. & when we laugh, we would be like, " HA HA, DA XIAO! " ^^ HEEEEEEEEE. Through these, I know more about people like evan and melissa. & Evan at first was like, now we have a secret with each other. Haha. They are really nice friends. Of course not forgetting Marianne and so many other people out there. Although i might be there for maybe only 3 weeks? or maybe just more of the 4 days camp, i grew alot and mixed with so many people. It's like the bond is there and you're not worried whether they will have a hard time accepting you. The youths at KPC are just so sociable. :D
Im stopping here now. I hope what I've learnt might enlightened you'll. If you dont understand anything, do ask me! (: Good night everybody. Sleep tight and CIAOS~
There's this unexpressable feeling in me.